This has been the busiest week, academically, that I can remember. I had so many exams, papers, and projects due during the last five days. I had Relief Society responsibilities, intramural tournament games, firesides, additional classes, and...Preference Week.
I would like to think that I am a machine that just runs on a schedule and produces great results, but the truth of the matter is that I am a 20 year old young lady that typically enjoys taking a nap here and there, likes to eat fry sauce for fun, and that is trying to do my best. Some events happened this week that factored in feelings and emotions, proving that I am, indeed, human.
Tuesday evening, I uploaded my missionary photo for my online application. I sat on the couch in our living room and just stared at the screen. At the bottom of the page, I had to option to SUBMIT my online application. I took in the moment. It was one of those moments that I know I will always remember. I made the dramatic click of the mouse that sent my online application on to the bishop. I seriously sat there for about ten minutes after I squealed a nervous, anxious, and completely excited sound. WOW. I could feel that spine tingling feeling of the Holy Ghost.
The next two days were two of THE. MOST. DIFFICULT. days of my entire life. I was on an extremely tight schedule starting at 8:00 am and ending at 11:30 pm. Thursday was particularly difficult. I was academically stressed, but there were others things going on, as well. A man added the cherry on my stress cake during our lunch date, and I tried to ignore the frustration inside of myself. I finished studying for one test in the library and decided it was high time to call my mother because I needed to de-stress.
However, I stopped in my tracks. I realized that I should be just as quick to call on my Heavenly Father as I am of my mother. I plopped all of my stuff on the floor in between the shelves of books in an empty part of the library. I fell to my knees and poured my heart out to Heavenly Father. I felt that comfort of the Spirit come over me. I learned an important lesson. I can't make it through life on my own. I am weak without Heavenly Father. I need Him in my life everyday. I need strength beyond my own.
I was able to complete everything by my 5:00 deadlines, and run home to change for my football game. I made it through the hard part, then was able to enjoy life again. My football team won, my thoughtful roommates had places a pile of fry sauce containers on my pillow (which totally made my day), and then I went on a really fun date.
I did end up talking with my mom on the phone and she pointed out what was not obvious to me. I couldn't figure out why this week was so dang hard! She simply explained that I had just completed my mission papers, so Satan must be raging in his devilish hell, wherever that may be.
Hmm..my wise mother is wise.
Brother Bott taught me that you have to face Satan head on and realize what he's doing. For every trial, there will be equal or greater blessings and joy. Likewise, for every blessing, there will be an equivalent trial. I know that my mission is going to be incredible and better than I can imagine. So, I should expect to be attacked by Satan.
I feel as though I have been soaring the last 7 months. My testimony has grown significantly and I have been cruising through everything. I went to Israel and literally walked in places that Christ walked. I served as the Girls Camp Director and learned what it means to truly love young women. I was called to serve as the Relief Society President in my BYU ward and I'm beginning to see what the Lord has in store for me. I am now just months away from my mission.
I must face opposition. Where is the growth if there is no challenge? Well, I will be completely honest. Thus far, I have been in a down right battle with Satan. As the time for me to leave on my mission approaches, the battle becomes more and more intense. It has taught me how real Satan is and how much he wants to destroy us.
HOWEVER.
I have been preparing myself to be an instrument in the hands of God since the pre-mortal life. I am in a very humble state and I'm ready to do anything He asks of me. I also know that Heavenly Father's plan will prevail and that He will give me the strength to do ANYTHING that He will ask of me. I will find strength beyond my own.
I'm going to make it.
I would like to think that I am a machine that just runs on a schedule and produces great results, but the truth of the matter is that I am a 20 year old young lady that typically enjoys taking a nap here and there, likes to eat fry sauce for fun, and that is trying to do my best. Some events happened this week that factored in feelings and emotions, proving that I am, indeed, human.
Tuesday evening, I uploaded my missionary photo for my online application. I sat on the couch in our living room and just stared at the screen. At the bottom of the page, I had to option to SUBMIT my online application. I took in the moment. It was one of those moments that I know I will always remember. I made the dramatic click of the mouse that sent my online application on to the bishop. I seriously sat there for about ten minutes after I squealed a nervous, anxious, and completely excited sound. WOW. I could feel that spine tingling feeling of the Holy Ghost.
The next two days were two of THE. MOST. DIFFICULT. days of my entire life. I was on an extremely tight schedule starting at 8:00 am and ending at 11:30 pm. Thursday was particularly difficult. I was academically stressed, but there were others things going on, as well. A man added the cherry on my stress cake during our lunch date, and I tried to ignore the frustration inside of myself. I finished studying for one test in the library and decided it was high time to call my mother because I needed to de-stress.
However, I stopped in my tracks. I realized that I should be just as quick to call on my Heavenly Father as I am of my mother. I plopped all of my stuff on the floor in between the shelves of books in an empty part of the library. I fell to my knees and poured my heart out to Heavenly Father. I felt that comfort of the Spirit come over me. I learned an important lesson. I can't make it through life on my own. I am weak without Heavenly Father. I need Him in my life everyday. I need strength beyond my own.
I was able to complete everything by my 5:00 deadlines, and run home to change for my football game. I made it through the hard part, then was able to enjoy life again. My football team won, my thoughtful roommates had places a pile of fry sauce containers on my pillow (which totally made my day), and then I went on a really fun date.
I did end up talking with my mom on the phone and she pointed out what was not obvious to me. I couldn't figure out why this week was so dang hard! She simply explained that I had just completed my mission papers, so Satan must be raging in his devilish hell, wherever that may be.
Hmm..my wise mother is wise.
Brother Bott taught me that you have to face Satan head on and realize what he's doing. For every trial, there will be equal or greater blessings and joy. Likewise, for every blessing, there will be an equivalent trial. I know that my mission is going to be incredible and better than I can imagine. So, I should expect to be attacked by Satan.
I feel as though I have been soaring the last 7 months. My testimony has grown significantly and I have been cruising through everything. I went to Israel and literally walked in places that Christ walked. I served as the Girls Camp Director and learned what it means to truly love young women. I was called to serve as the Relief Society President in my BYU ward and I'm beginning to see what the Lord has in store for me. I am now just months away from my mission.
I must face opposition. Where is the growth if there is no challenge? Well, I will be completely honest. Thus far, I have been in a down right battle with Satan. As the time for me to leave on my mission approaches, the battle becomes more and more intense. It has taught me how real Satan is and how much he wants to destroy us.
HOWEVER.
I have been preparing myself to be an instrument in the hands of God since the pre-mortal life. I am in a very humble state and I'm ready to do anything He asks of me. I also know that Heavenly Father's plan will prevail and that He will give me the strength to do ANYTHING that He will ask of me. I will find strength beyond my own.
I'm going to make it.
